A Little Yarn On The Side

Bob:  We're here at the end of the 2012 Ravellenic Games with Ms. Sutton, who finished her third knitting games with 9 medals--certainly a personal best.  Ms. Sutton, how are you feeling after such a performance? Toni:  Well, I'm certainly pleased to have gained 9 medals--that's exciting.  I was, of course, trying to finish a few more WIPs and would have liked to have reached 10 medals, but with work and the garden and having company for several days during the games, I'm pleased with what I did get done.   Ron:  Now during the last part of the games, you did branch out into some other hobbies as well--finishing your 13th thread for the year on the never-ending cross-stitch and some new embroidered Christmas ornaments and towels.  Was that a strategic move or were you having trouble concentrating? Toni:  I think I was starting to lose a bit of steam in my knitting, and nothing is more motivating to me as a knitter than to remind myself that...

Bob:  With just 15 minutes to spare, Ms. Sutton has squeaked out a 9th medal in WIPs Wrestling: Ron:  She falls short of the 10-medal goal, but what an astounding last-minute effort.  Two medals earned on the final day of the games--that's some dedication.   Bob:  It really is, Ron.  There were some tense moments when the extra row of garter stitch Ms. Sutton added so the cast-off edge would roll to the inside instead of the outside caused some problems with the direction of the first row of the neckband, but her perseverance has paid off.  The problems did cost her the opportunity to go for that 10th medal, but three finished WIPs is still an outstanding effort.  Any word on what Ms. Sutton's next plans are? Ron:  No official word, but if this reporter had to guess.......   Bob:  Perhaps we'd better wait until tomorrow for the wrap-up interview...........

Bob:  With less than one day remaining in the 2012 Ravellenic Games, we're seeing what may well be the final burst of activity from Ms. Sutton with another completed WIP: which I believe is a balaclava, though it does bear a striking resemblance to the "Yip-Yips" of Sesame Street fame as well . Ron:  It does indeed, Bob, and Ms. Sutton is known to be rather a fan of the Muppets, though in this reporter's view, a silk-blend yarn is less appropriate for a Yip-Yip than that problematic stash of Fun Fur Ms. Sutton likes to ignore.   Bob:  She does indeed, Ron, though I think by now most knitters have generally chosen to try to hide or ignore any possible experimentation with Fun Fur and novelty yarns.  Not a proud moment in any knitter's life to admit to possessing any yarn that looks like it was spun from the hair of a shaved toy monkey.  It's a bit like the macrame vests of the 1960s and 1970s--we know of their certain existence, but no one has eve...

Bob:  We're here in the final days of Ravellenics, and it looks like the early burst of speed has definitely faded.  While the balaclava has seen some progress,    Ms. Sutton was seen in the sewing room today, and her dedication may be wavering.   Ron:  It certainly seems that way.  Will she fade entirely, or will she find enough dedication to finish the balaclava or the shrug before the closing ceremonies at 5:00 PM on Sunday?  Or are 6 medals Ms. Sutton's limit?  Keep it tuned here for all the latest updates?

Bob:  We're here at Day 11 of the 2012 Ravellenic Games.  It's been a fierce competition so far--but with 6 days left, it's impossible to predict the final outcome.  Will the WIPs get Wrestled?  Will the hats be dashed?  Ron:  I think we're all on the edges of our seats here, Bob.  Ms. Sutton is showing progress on the second sleeve of the purple shrug, and could be turning in another wrestled WIP any day.  With 4 projects completed or frogged and 5 remaining--with 6 medals already awarded--we could see Ms. Sutton buckle down surprise us with a record number of wrestled WIPs.  Bob:  Or we could see her run screaming from the room as we did with the Yoke-Collar Pullover incident.   I think even in a seasoned knitlete, things can go either way in the last days of the games.    Ron:  Very true , Bob.  In the 1990s we saw early knitlete Ivanna Pearl crack under the strain of the Cobweb Lace Luge and start knitt...

Ron:  Since-- as the knitting world has learned --competitions are for the hawking of products, we pause in our Ravellenic coverage to bring you these messages from our sponsors: For the knitter who has received "helpful suggestions" that she organize her stash,  Organized yarn stickers .  Because stash organization is no laughing matter. And to protect a knitter from rain or overstuffed yarn closets, it's the black sheep umbrella .  The latest fashion in protecting knitters from falling rain or yarn. And for the knitter looking for new ways to suck up even more of her knitting time, it's the   sheep-racing video game .  Bringing you the latest in knitterly distractions.   And finally, for reasons no one has yet to figure out, it's sheep "skins" for electric guitars .  Um........yeah. We now return you to the 2012 Ravellenic games, already in progress.

Ron:  We're here at the 2012 Ravellenics with a late-breaking update.  The recently sighted purple-blobby-tea cozy is beginning to look like it might be a sweater of some sort: Bob:  That's right, Ron.  Unless there is a bigger tea pot in need of cozy-ing than this reporter has ever seen, this is definitely looking sweater-ish.  I believe we can even see a finished sleeve of some sort, which may mean that this is more than 60-65% finished.  Could this turn out to be Ms. Sutton's fourth completed project for the games and seventh sweater for the year? Ron:  Keep it tuned here to the Wide World of Wool for all the latest Ravellenic updates.

Bob:  We pause now in our coverage of the 2012 Ravellenic Games for a few words from our sponsors. For the truly coordinated knitter, knitting-themed checks .  For the knitter ready to admit how all the money is being spent anyway.   And, to for the knitter looking for a truly unique look, it's   crazy knitting lady peel-and-stick wall decals .  Available (for whatever reason) in sizes up to 78 by 42 inches.  For the knitter who wants to prove that a knitting obsession could definitely get worse.   And for the times when knitting really has gotten worse, it's  Sheep Dip  Scotch Malt. To help forget those small knitting mistakes, and to help you achieve REALLY spectacular ones.    Keep it tuned here for ALL the latest on the Ravellenic games.

Ron:  We're here at the 2012 Ravellenic Games, and it looks like Ms. Sutton has just broken her medals streak.  With 6 medals so far, unless there is some furious knitting tonight, her medal-a-day streak has come to an end.  Bob:  It's been an impressive run, but I think you're right, Ron.  There has been some knitting today, but nothing completed, and nothing nearing completion.  Ron:  With some big WIP contenders such as the Kauni cardigan, her streak was unlikely to continue throughout the games, but it was probably highly motivating.  6 medals is certainly a new record for Ms. Sutton, which could impact the rather impressive dedication we've seen so far.  Will she try for one more?  Three more?  No more?  It's too early to tell, of course, but we have heard rumors of company coming to visit this weekend, which could have a serious impact on Ms. Sutton's performance.  Will it slow her down, or even knock her out of...

Bob:  We're here at the Ravellenic Games on Day 4, and Ms. Sutton has just earned THREE medals with a single Gingerbread Hat: Ron:  That's right, Bob.  Not only does it earn medals in Cable Steeplechase and the Hat Dash, because this yarn has been in what is known as "deep stash," (owned for more than a year), it qualifies for Synchronized Stash Busting.  Bob:  This was definitely deep stash, Ron.  Ms. Sutton had actually believed that all of this particular yarn had been used up and had removed it from her Ravelry stash page, so we might call this "subterranean stash." Ron:  How right you are, Bob.  With the discovery of TWO balls of this yarn as well as the leftover balls from the ABC sweater, Ms. Sutton's stash has actually grown on Ravelry during these games.  This could lead to an inquiry into Ms. Sutton's standing as an effective "Cold Sheeper" for 2012. Bob:  It does at least raise questions about Ms. Sutton's organiza...

Bob:  We're here at day 3 of the Ravellenic games, and I don't mind telling you, today has stunned this reporter. Ron:   In completely unexpected show of knitterly dedication, Ms. Sutton finished her first WIP by 7:30 this morning: which gives her three medals in three days, and instead of being distracted by other projects, Ms. Sutton is more than halfway through a Gingerbread hat, which is cross-competing in no less than THREE events.  If Ms. Sutton finishes this tomorrow, she will have racked up six medals in the first FOUR days of the games--certainly a record for this knitlete and a strong showing for a knitter who has been known to take 4 years to finish just the seams and buttons on a sweater. Bob:  It is indeed, Ron.  If we continue to see this level of unexpected dedication, Ms. Sutton could possibly finish the 5 remaining WIPs she has entered for the games. Ron:  She could indeed, Bob, though that will be a stretch of both knitte...

Ron:  We're here at the first full day of the Ravellenic Games, and in a stunning display of knitterly discipline, Ms. Sutton has just earned her second medal by finishing a mitten ornament for the Holiday Hurdles.   Bob:  Two medals in two days--that is impressive, though could this mean that our contestant is getting distracted from WIP Wrestling even earlier than anticipated? Ron:  Shockingly, she seems to have retained her WIP finishing focus, and is down to just the seams and buttons: on the first WIP entry.  At 8:41 she's still seaming furiously, so we may see a finished item before the day has ended.   Bob:  Three medals in two days?  That would be a new record for Ms. Sutton as a knitlete--do you think the addition of a training camp has made the difference this year? Ron:  It's hard to say this early, but even finishing one WIP will be more dedication than Ms. Sutton has shown so far this year.  Still, she has five...

Bob:  We're here at the first day of the 2012 Ravellenic games.  Ms. Sutton has shown an early burst of speed with an early medal in the Frogging Trampoline. Ron:  That's right, Bob.  Not only has she frogged with great speed and agility, the icky blue acrylic yarn has been tossed into a donation bin.  We haven't seen Ms. Sutton part with yarn willingly very often--if ever--and that was a surprising early move.   Bob:  It certainly was.  Considering the bin full of Red Heart acrylic yarn she insists is for ornaments and other crafting items--not to mention the stash of Fun Fur recently uncovered--it's surprising to learn there is any yarn so icky that Ms Sutton might part with it.   Ron:  Too true, Bob!  Perhaps the recent sewing room shelf project has truly created a sense of moderation in our competitor. Bob:  That seems unlikely, Ron, as Ms. Sutton was seen to be briefly browsing lace shawl patterns shortly before ...

Bob:   With the 2012 Ravellenic Games less than 24 hours away, we're here with one of the contestants.  Ms. Sutton, as a previous knitlete, what can you tell us about this year's games? Toni:  Well, as you know, Bob, there's been some contention with the U.S. Olympic Committee that Americans knitting in something called the "Ravelympics" denigrates U.S. Olympic athletes, while having their uniforms made in China by underpaid workers does not.  In the end, it was decided that since the knitters had no unskilled workers to exploit for profit or sponsorships to sell to fast food and chemical companies , it would be best to rename the knitting games to preserve the purity of the Ravellenic spirit. Ron:  Has the controversy changed the games at all? Toni:  Yes--this year we have more than 11,000 knitters worldwide set to denigrate the U.S. athletes, and an event that normally gathers no press coverage has been covered by NPR, the Atlantic Monthly , Busi...

Random update time: *  Because of the bullies at the U.S. Olympic Committee, the Ravelympics have been changed to the Ravellenics.  I think I like the new name.  The behavior of USOC has tainted the Olympics forever for me, so I'm pleased that the games will now have nothing to do with them at all.  There are discussions about changing the dates in the future or having the yearly, so maybe it's a good move after all.  I will not be bothering to update any of the verbiage on the blog.  Even if USOC is so petty as to start stalking blogs, the games WERE called the Ravelympics until USOC decided they owned even partial BITS of the word "Olympics," so I'll just add the following disclaimer: Any mention of the word "Ravelympics" occurred before the jerks at the USOC decided to persecute anyone even using a fraction of the word "Olympics," so even in your wildest pettiness, I used the term before you decided to insult 2 million knitters. That s...